Chastity gives you freedom?

As everyone knows, you have freedom in life to choose whatever you would like. You can stick your hand through a flame if you’d like to. However, you are not free from the consequences. When we use our freedom to make poor choices, we often are left with devastating consequences that trap us, instead of setting us free. Jesus said, “You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free,” John 8:32.

Chastity is God’s beautiful design for our sexuality. If you choose chastity, a wise and healthy choice, you experience some of the freedom Jesus was referring to in the Bible. However, if you use your freedom to not choose chastity, the consequences you face can be, more often than not, life-damaging.

Here are some of the reasons living a life of chastity is fun, healthy, and freeing. Chastity gives you the FREEDOM TO:

1. Dump Losers!
   When sex binds you to another, it is often difficult to leave a relationship, even if it is unhealthy. In the dating or courtship process, you should be trying to figure out who would be a suitable marriage partner for you. If someone isn’t working out, for any reason, you should be able to leave any relationship. A good friend of mine stayed in an emotionally abusive relationship for 3 years because he didn’t want to leave the comfort of their sexual bond.
2. Date Without Physical Fears or Expectations
   No one enjoys dates when the only thing on your mind is…what’s going to happen at the end of the night? How far will he/she want to go? Will we go all the way tonight, next week, or next month? Chastity gives you the freedom to date without the awkwardness of physical demands. You can have more fun and be yourself in such situations.
3. Avoid All STDs or the Possibility of Pregnancy
   Enough said.
4. Know You Are Truly Loved as a Person, Not a Body If sex could occur before marriage, one might always wonder… does this person hang out with me because they truly care about me and that’s it? Or do they expect physical “gifts” from me? If someone dates you without physical expectations, you can be confident they truly love you as a person. Without chastity, you’ll never know.
5. Give All of Yourself in Marriage
   You might not think this is very important now, but, trust me, for many years of your life, your marriage will be the most important relationship you have on earth. Save something for this relationship. Start something new with this person. You might have traveled the world, but give this one, most intimate aspect of life to the most important relationship you’ll have in this world. Don’t settle for cheap experiences in the meantime that would jeopardize the intimacy you desire in marriage.
6. Truly Love Those You Date
   True love wants what is best for the other person, even if that means sacrificing what we desire. If you truly love the person you are with, you would not want to put them at risk of any of the emotional, physical or spiritual consequences that could occur from sex outside of marriage. These consequences can be devastatingly painful and may not surface for years. *Ronnie had sex in all of her relationships in college. After college, she met Kirk. Kirk and Ronnie started having sex, however, he soon realized that this was hurting Ronnie’s spiritual life a great deal. Kirk told Ronnie he wanted to stop having sex because he didn’t want to see her relationship with God suffer as it had been. This is true love. Kirk wanted what was best for Ronnie.
7. Experience True Respect
   Respect in relationships means giving someone the honor they deserve. By choosing chastity you not only show your respect your partner’s well-being and their body, but you also show the respect you have for yourself. When sex is kept in marriage, you show respect for sex as well—it deserves to be honored and cherished through all of your life. It is meant for marriage (not to be just something you do with friends or your current date). Sex is unique, so is your body and the one you are with—respect all of these now and you’ll never regret it later. When you give respect, respect is given back to you.

Chastity brings FREEDOM to:

1. Know that a person likes you because of who you are and not because you will “go all the way”
2. Have self-respect and respect from others because of standing firm and accomplishing a goal
3. Know trust, honesty and patience
4. Experience peace of mind
5. Develop true intimacy
6. Have a clear conscience
7. Have healthy relationships
8. Discover the true meaning of love
9. Share a bond with your spouse that no one else has shared
10. Focus on communication skills and develop non-sexual relationships
11. Have a solid foundation as you enter marriage
12. Look forward to a very special honeymoon!

Adapted from Choices/Teen Awareness, Inc.

By Heather Gallagher
The REAP Team